Sick Notes and Sofa Days: The Art of Managing Absence Without Becoming the Fun Police
Let’s be honest — nobody really dreams of growing up to manage absence records. But here we are, clutching our Bradford Factor scores and trying to decide whether “my cat looked at me funny” counts as a legitimate reason to stay home.
Absence management can be a tricky balance. Too strict, and you’re the workplace equivalent of the headteacher who confiscates footballs at breaktime. Too lenient, and suddenly “feeling a bit meh” becomes a valid Tuesday tradition.
So how do you keep things fair, kind, and legally sound — without turning into the dreaded Fun Police?
Know your numbers (but don’t become a robot)
Having a clear absence policy is essential — it’s your safety net. But absence management isn’t just about tallying days and triggering letters; it’s about spotting patterns and understanding context.
If Janet’s off sick every other Friday, there might be a story there. Maybe it’s medical, maybe it’s personal… or maybe it’s because her favourite TV show drops a new episode every Thursday night. Either way, numbers tell you when to start a conversation — not when to start a disciplinary.
Have the chat — not the interrogation
Return-to-work meetings are your friend, but they shouldn’t feel like a police interview. Keep it conversational, show genuine care, and focus on understanding the “why” rather than catching someone out.
Remember: “How are you feeling now?” is a much better opener than “Where’s your evidence?”
Spot the difference between sofa days and serious illness
Sometimes people need duvet days — life happens. But there’s a difference between a one-off mental health reset and repeated casual absence. Having supportive systems in place (like wellbeing check-ins, flexible working, or access to counselling) can reduce those sofa days without making people feel punished for being human.
Keep it fair (even when it’s awkward)
Consistency is key. If you let Barry in Sales get away with a questionable sick day because “he’s a good lad”, but clamp down on Paula in Admin for the same thing, you’ll quickly have resentment brewing faster than the office kettle.
Don’t forget the why
The end goal isn’t just to reduce absence — it’s to have a healthy, engaged, and supported team. People are more likely to turn up (and perform well) when they feel valued, understood, and trusted.
Final thought
Managing absence is a bit like making tea for the office — everyone has an opinion on the “right” way to do it, and if you get it wrong, you’ll hear about it. But with clear policies, consistent application, and a sprinkle of empathy, you can keep people healthy, happy, and at work… without earning yourself the Fun Police badge.
For more lighthearted yet practical tips on keeping your workplace happy and healthy, check out our other HR blogs here.
If you want the official (less tea-related) guidance, the ACAS website has some great tips on managing staff absence fairly and legally.